Thursday 14 February 2013

2. Rehearsal

Closing the door behind herself she took in a breath and carried on walking through to where she could hear her Mother humming. She missed the home-like feeling of her parents' house, although she couldn't argue that the house she and Max shared was horrible she preferred the cosy closeness she felt in this house. Max was hardly home anymore, not since his latest promotion. His mind and body were focused one-hundred percent on his career. That being said, he was and always would be a great Father. Extinguishing her thought trail she quickly smelt the ends of her hair and knitted jumper shoulders. Thankfully she had a change of clothes in her car, eliminating the possibility of her Mother picking up on the smell of smoke.

"You're late."

"I know. I'm sorry, we finished up way after closing time." She folded her lips and set her keys on the wooden table, waiting for her Mother to at least turn around and visually acknowledge her presence.

"Have you eaten?"

"Yeah, I grabbed somethin' on the way here. Thanks." Their brisk exchange of words didn't soften the atmosphere as Carol continued to dry the pots and pans by the sink. "Where's Mica?"

"He's in the lounge room with your brother." Finally turning around to face her daughter, Carol let out a pitiful sigh. "You look exhausted."

"I'm fine, really Mom. I just need to get Mica home and have an early night." Picking up her keys again she smiled as a way of saying thank you and turned to head out of the kitchen but her Mother's voice stopped her.

"Are you still using?" She could tell by the way she said it that in her mind she believed she was.

"What?"

"Drugs, are you sti-"

"I know what you meant Mom, I just can't believe you'd even question me about that. You honestly think I'd be puttin' that shit in my body when I'm still feedin' my child?" The look on Nicki's face let Carol know she was hurt, not angry.

"I'm sorry. I know you'd never do anything to harm him. I just worry, that's all."

"Well you don't need to." Moving forward some more she held her Mom's hand comfortingly. "I'm fine and I'm clean. I'ont ever wanna get that way again. Ever." It was easy for Carol to believe her because she could see quite obviously that she meant every word.

"Okay, be safe and give Max our love."

"I will." Smiling again she kissed her Mother's cheek and headed through to the lounge room, her mood automatically lifting when she set eyes on her baby. "Hey Lani."

"S'up Nic, how you keepin'?" His face beamed as he stood with the five-month old in his arms.

"I'm good and how's my baby?" She increased the pitch of her voice and smiled whilst reaching out for the child.

"Ah, y'know? I'm okay, thanks for askin'." Laughing through the end of his sentence he handed Mica over to her as she continued to death glare him.

"Not you, dumbass. I was talkin' 'bout my little man."

"Oh, yeah he's alright too I guess. He's gettin' a lil' grouchy though."

"Yeah, he prolly wants feedin' soon." She held him against herself more securely before looking back at her brother. "I'mma get him home, where are his things?" Looking around herself she scanned the room for his baby bag when Jelani gently placed it on her free shoulder. "Thanks, I'll see you tomorrow for the dinner rehearsal right?"

"You sure will." He spoke as he followed behind her to the front door. "Oh wait, before you go could you ask Drake if he minds filimin' for us?"

"What?" Her mind had ceased at that point, only thinking of what he'd recently been focusing his camera handling skills on. Sex.

"The wedding, we ain't got nobody to film yet and it was the only job Kel gave me. She's gonna be rippin' if I don't get that right." He wrinkled his eyebrows worriedly. "He's aight with a camera ain't he?"

"Yeah, yeah of course he is. I'm seein' him tomorrow, I'll ask him but I can't make no promises."

"Oh thanks Nic, that'd be gold. You're a lifesaver, you know that?"

"Whatever." Rolling her eyes playfully she continued out to the car, and dealt with Mica as Jelani watched on. He couldn't deny how proud he was of her for getting herself back on track so well. Nobody could. She was on the brink of self-destruction before she found out she was pregnant. Just knowing there was a life inside of her was enough to make her see clearly. Fourteen months later and she was alive, well and loving motherhood.


She returned home to an empty house. Nothing new to her as of late so instead of dwelling on it she decided to take glory in it, she felt as though she hadn't cooked a proper meal in ages and so she did just that. It was always something Max would get worked up about since almost everything in his house was white and shiny and Nicki never practiced the "Clean as you Cook" method, instead she would end up with a whole kitchen full of mess. The latter description was perfect for how the room was looking at that exact moment. A filthy pig-sty. On the plus-side her cooking turned out exactly as she wanted it. Smiling to herself she swept her wet curls from her face and proceeded to clean. She'd heard Max's car enter the garage and was thanking God she'd just got out of the shower in case he could smell weed on her. She'd have to remind Drake about that tomorrow. Quickly and quietly placing the plates down she waited for him to enter the room.

"Hey baby." Kissing her cheek softly he looked over the table as she greeted him back. "S'all this for?" His smile made her mimic his expression whilst he set his briefcase down and shrugged out of his coat.

"Well, I thought since you've been working so hard I should treat you to a lil' somethin', why? Don't you like it?"

"No, no I love the idea! And it smells good too." Having been sat with a bunch of his female colleagues today he'd absorbed some of the things they'd been saying about their own partners, only to realise he exemplified a lot of the issues they spoke of. The main one being lack of communication and affection. Both of which he was desperate to try harder with, for the sake of his marriage.

"Good, take a seat then." She tied her hair back as she sashayed away from him, heavily sighing when Mica's baby monitored screeched out. "I knew I should have fed him before you got back." She pouted and faced her husband, who at this moment looked to be quite deep in thought.

"Tell you what, how 'bout we stick these in the oven to keep warm, I'll go shower up and change and you can go see to Mica?" He set his napkin down and approached her from behind, wrapping his large arms around her tiny frame. That was another thing he could commend her on. How fast she got her pre-pregnancy body back, it was as if she just stepped out of the weight and went back to how she was when they met.

"That sounds like a good idea to me." She giggled softly once she felt his lips on her neck. She'd missed this more than words could describe. The feeling of being loved was one that was slowly growing more and more alien to her. Pulling away from his wife he tapped her butt and disappeared up to their bathroom whilst she put their food in the oven to keep warm. She too headed up the stairs, feeling more positive than she had in a while. That feeling was strengthened when she entered Mica's dimly lit room. He was still fussing as he lay on his front with his legs kicking out behind him, visibly frustrated.

"What's up grumpy?" She picked him up out of his crib and continued to talk to him as she made her way to their room, seeing as though Max was changing she thought she might as well put something more comfortable on. Laying the impatient baby in the middle of the bed she swiftly threw off her clothes and got into a pair of sweats and a grey tee before returning to her now screaming child, who had yet again rolled on to his stomach and rendered himself helpless. He could never roll back. "That's what you get for bein' so impatient sir." He settled a little once in his Mother's arms again and became completely silent when she got herself comfy resting against the headboard and finally pulled her shirt up, giving him what he wanted.

That was as far as their evening got. Shortly after exiting the shower, Max had to take an important business call and upon his return he found Nicki fast asleep with Mica out for the count laying on her chest. He felt a twinge of regret knowing she'd fallen asleep waiting for him, those regretful feelings only grew stronger when he carried his tiny son back to his crib and returned back to their room to start packing. He'd been called away for a business seminar, something he couldn't miss. Kissing her gently on the forehead he left her a note, he decided to stay in a hotel for the night. His flight wasn't until the morning but he figured if he left now he could avoid getting Nicki worked up and angry over his sudden departure, he hated to admit it but sometimes he felt as though he was walking on eggshells, just waiting for her to relapse after an argument. It wasn't that he didn't have faith in her, he just didn't want to be the reason for her to spiral back into addiction. Saying goodbye to Mica, he shut his door a little behind him and left for the Hotel.

***

"Hey! What's with the anger?" Drake's brow furrowed as he held the door open for Nicki, she was fairly rampaging up the steps backwards trying to heave Mica's stroller up with her. He knew she was crying at that point when she let out a frustrated grunt. "Stop, take Mica out and go inside. You're soaked. I'll get the stroller." Placing his hand gently on her shoulder he watched her lift the protective rain screen and lift him out carefully before she headed through to his lounge room. It took him a minute or two to manoeuvre the damn thing into the hallway but once it was out of the rain he shut his door and breathed out heavily. He already knew this would be something Max related. It had been happening a lot lately.

"I'm sorry, I know I said-"

"Don't even say it, Nicki. Our friendship comes first, don't worry 'bout the tape. That can wait." He took a seat beside her as she tried to get Mica to settle. "What's happened?"

"Nothing I can't deal with."

"Sounds like you're dealin' with it pretty well." He smirked a little and motioned for her to hand Mica to him. "You might wanna take your jacket off, it's drenched." He let his eyes follow her frame as she got to her feet after handing her baby to him.

"Why is it that I always feel as though we come second, to everything?" She wiped her cold nose and lay her jacket in front of his fireplace.

"He's away again?"

"He didn't even tell me." She sniffled and crossed her arms tightly over herself. "He left last night whilst I was sleepin' and let me know in a fucking note. A note, Drake! Who the fuck leaves their wife a note saying he's outta the goddamn state for eight days?!" Her yells continued to increase in volume, causing Mica to fuss even more hearing the hostility in his Mother's voice.

"You're right, that is messed up but it's happened. What's yellin' gonna solve? It's not healthy for you and it isn't healthy for Mica." He kept calm as he spoke to her, witnessing her shoulders relax as she let go of her anger. As soon as she saw Mica becoming distressed she'd toned it down a little anyway but Drake's soothing tone and truthful words helped too.

"Ugh, I know." Bringing her hands up to her face she wiped at her eyes tiredly. "I'ont know why I let it get to me so much I guess I just..." Her sentence died before she finished.

"You guess what, Nic?" He saw her falter for a moment before answering.

"Nothing, I don't know what I was gonna say to be honest." Covering her lie with a small laugh, she sniffled once again and wiped away the last of her tears. "I'm just gonna freshen up in your bathroom before I feed him."

"Aight, take your time. He's goin' nowhere." He carried on bouncing the small boy as he watched her head to the bathroom. Part of him was screaming to follow her and make sure she wasn't going to do anything stupid but another part of him was begging him to trust that she wouldn't. He was relieved when she returned less than a minute later with her makeup touched up. "You good?"

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine. Thanks." Sweeping her hair behind her ear she extended her arms to hold her son as Drake handed him to her.

"How 'bout I drive us to the dinner rehearsal? I'll bring us back here and you can pick your car up then."

"Or we could go in my car? Mica's seat is already strapped in."

"That works too." He smiled whilst watching her sit down to feed Mica. "Sorted then."

"Oh yeah, Lani wanted me to ask if you'd film on the day?" She leant back some more once Mica had latched on and began his feed.

"'Course I will, he should know he doesn't need to ask." Pulling his laptop on to his knee he started working on some of the clips he'd got so far. With the volume down of course.

"Don't you think it's a lil'...Weird though?" She curled her lip and wrinkled her brow slightly, waiting for his response.

"Weird?"

"Yeah, y'know? Everything that video camera sees us doing and you're filmin' my brother's wedding with it? I'onno, I just find it odd."

"Well, I'll use my other one. That better?"

"Much. Thank you." Her smiled faded as it was followed by a sigh.

"S'up?"

"I'm just tryin' to think of an excuse as to why Max isn't gonna be at rehearsal dinner. I told him three times to keep today free." She shook her head and looked back down at Mica, holding his little hand with her fingers as his eyes were taking longer to open with each blink.

"Tellem the truth, he had an important meetin'. People'll understand, Nic. Especially your brother, we all know Max has a high-payin' job. It's no biggie."

"Why d'you always know how to make me feel better?" She laughed and looked up at him, her smile was everything.

"'Cause you're my best friend and I know you better than you know yourself."

"Mm, sometimes I think the same thing." She carried on watching him as he clicked away at his laptop before she caught his attention with a groan. "No, baby don't go to sleep! You're not done yet!" Obviously she didn't really want to wake him, hence her whispering pleas.

"You wanna lay him down upstairs? His crib is still in the spare room."

"Yeah, I'll be down in a minute." Carefully getting to her feet she fixed her shirt and held him to her chest whilst carrying him to the spare room. Once she returned she joined him on the same couch. Laying back comfortably. "Whattya doin'?"

"Actually, I'm working on our tape. You wanna see some?" He looked at her, his eyes full of wonder as she contemplated her answer. On some level she really did want to watch but then again the whole illegality of it in her mind was making her want to keep her eyes innocent to their sexual encounters. But for this moment, she was far too intrigued to say no.

"Press play." She kept her eyes locked on to his before he broke contact and turned to the screen, pressing play without hesitating. Almost instantly their recorded moans and pants of pleasure broke through the speakers. As for what they were seeing, Nicki couldn't believe her eyes. Was that really her? The angles and lighting worked to their advantage, emphasising their most admirable parts. Not being one to brag she was finding it hard not to admit that she looked out of this world. And Drake? He  was having some sort of effect on her, not just in the video. Feeling him shift next to her she looked at the side of his head. His focus was directed purely on the video, the breath caught in his throat as he re-lived that moment. Watching her reach her climax through his actions.

"Damn." He mumbled the word out, discreetly grabbing at the growing bulge in his pants. He was beginning to feel as though this was a bad idea but sensing Nicki moving closer to him he turned to face her. Flinching a little when he felt her hand rest between his legs as she rubbed firmly at his imprisoned erection. It was obvious that they were both holding back, thinking of an excuse to make what they were doing seem right.

"We could count it as rehearsal?" Her breathless and stilted whisper answered their unspoken thoughts and threw him into overdrive before he roughly started unbuttoning her shirt. Both finding what they sought after in each other. Just as they always did.

...

Nicki and Mica Sleeping


*Thanks SO much for all the comments left on the first chapter, you all really encouraged me to post chapter two! Hope this was alright! :/ Thanks for reading and Sweet Dreams will be updated next :))*

Friday 8 February 2013

1. More Than A Muse?

Laying in the middle of the bed she let her head tilt back as the pleasure started to overcome her. Although the sight before him was both insanely distracting and arousing he attempted to keep his focus.

"Arch your back some more."

"Like this?" She moaned at the same time as complying with his order.

"Mhm, just like that. Keep doin' that." He smiled and adjusted himself whilst he moved the tripod across the concrete floor. "Turn to face me." Watching her move her head slightly, he directed the lens and zoomed in on her naked body.

"That better?"

"Perfect."

"How long 'til you come join me?" She shut her eyes slowly and breathed out feeling the effects of her teasing fingertips on herself.

"By the looks of it, not long. Keep goin' baby." Drake stepped away from the camera and rubbed himself as he continued to stare at her. The mewls escaping her lips were making him grow harder beneath the fabric of his pants. "Damn Nicki, you look so good."

"Oh God." She moaned out loudly.

"You almost there?" He asked seductively through a smile as he walked over to her. The movement of her hand had doubled in speed as she played with herself, her left hand making contact with her nipple whilst she brought her own body closer and closer to the brink of climax. Writhing around, trying to avoid her own touch as her toes curled and her knees remained raised and parted from one another.

"Mmmyeaah! I'm-" She stopped in order to groan. "I'm gonna cum!" Her brows were pushed together and her body tensed up in a state of pure ecstasy as a hot wave of pleasure began to wash over her trembling frame.

"Hold on Nicki, I don't want you to cum yet." He quickly moved over to the tripod and removed his camera from the straps before taking it over to her. She'd slowed down considerably and her breath was heavy but more controlled.

"I couldn't stop it, I tri-"

"Shh, it's okay." He smiled down at her panting body. "Gimme your hand."

"This one?" She smirked breathlessly knowing he meant the right one as he reached for it and licked off all traces of her sweet bodily fluids from her fingers.

"You taste so good." Shuffling closer to her spent body he trailed the camera up and down the length of her torso as she stretched her arms up above her head and lay them on the mattress lazily.

"You gon' finish off what I started?"

"You know it." Moving over the top of her he steadied himself on one arm, focusing the camera on her face.

"Don't." She frowned harshly and pushed the lens away from her well defined and glowing features.

"Don't what?"

"Stop pushin' it in my face like that. I'ont like it."

"Why not? You got a beautiful face." He stared down at her as she looked up at his glazed and reddned eyes.

"Turn it off." The tone of her voice let him know she wasn't playing. Doing as she said he turned it off and stopped filming before setting it on the sheets next to her head.

"Need a lil' somethin' to get you goin'?"

"No. I already told you I can't do that shit anymore."

"You wanna do this another time then?" He made sure to get the concern in his voice across to her and was thankful when she nodded. "Aight, I'll go get us somethin' to eat." Pushing himself up off of her he put away his equiptment and left her to get dressed. She just sat for a while as her head started to spin. This had gone way too far. Letting the sheets fall from her grip she stood up and took her naked self to bathroom and showered before re-dressing and joing Drake back upstairs. He was sat as if everything was normal, watching TV with a plate in his lap.

"Yours is in the kitchen." Turning back and looking at her he smiled. She really was beautiful.

"Thanks." She trapsed through and dished her takeout on to a plate before returning to the lounge and taking a seat on the armchair opposite him. He'd already noticed there was something wrong.

"You okay?"

"I can't do this anymore, Drake." She tried to avoid his glazed eyes as she peered down at the rice on her plate, which suddenly didn't look so delicious anymore.

"You mean the whole tape thing?"

"Everything!" Her loud answer was responded to with silence as he sat forward and pulled a plastic bag from his pant pocket. "Seriously? I'm sat here trynna tell you what's up and you're just gonna act like I'm not speakin' and get high?" She scoffed dramatically and threw her plate on to the coffee table between them. He didn't even flinch. "Fuck this shit!" Upon reaching the doorway she felt his strong grip on her wrist.

"Don't go."

"Why?" She yelled as she snatched her hand from his grasp. "I can't do this anymore Aubrey, it's completely fucked up!"

"You're my best friend, please stay?" Even though his eyes were glossy, red and halfway shut she couldn't ignore her friend's plea.

"That's exactly why it's so messed up. You're my friend, not my husband or my boyfriend or even an ex! You're like my brother and we're fucking around for this project of yours? It's so wrong." She softened her voice, listening to the facts spoken aloud made it sound even worse.

"What's wrong with us?" He asked miserably and ran his hand roughly over his face before slumping on to the arm of the chair.

"There's nothing wrong with us, babe. Just what we're doing." Sitting herself next to him she reconnected their hands and pulled the bag of marijuana from him.

They'd been best friends for years, nothing more and nothing less. As late teens however, they continued to find themselves in lust of one another. The sexual tension was too great to ignore, so they chose not to ignore it and now as young adults they still seemed to fall into the same situations. Only now it was different. Their circumstances had taken a sickening turn, which Nicki blamed on their occasional experimentation of various drugs and the project Drake was working on. A tape compiled of various sexual acts performed in his basement, all in the name of his erotic film-making debut. When he asked Nicki he never imagined she'd say yes but getting the answer he sought after, he didn't question her. Their little secret had become more difficult to hide when Nicki experienced a pregnancy scare and her husband started to notice marks on her. Marks of passion that weren't from his touch. The physical relationship they shared was one neither could explain. Only that it was as torturous as an addiction. Both loved the feeling the other gave them but at the same time it had damaging effects and no matter how hard they tried to call it quits, one would always fall weak at the knees and relapse. This was no love affair though and that's what scared Nicki so much. It was pure lust that pulled them together. Or so they thought. Could it be that it was love disguised as lust? Strong and undamagable feelings warped by their fear of acknowledging the blatantly obvious?

"Nicki?"

"What?" She turned to look at him, the confusion evident in her stunningly brown eyes.

"I asked you if Max knew you was here?"

"Are you kidding me? No. He doesn't." She sighed sadly and looked down. She was deeply ashamed of her infidelity but had Max been a more admirable husband maybe she wouldn't look elsewhere for satisfaction and better yet, affection. She recieved both of those when she was with Drake but she'd never experienced the feeling of being loved. Only the love her Mother had for her and the love her baby boy had for her. But never love from a man. Her encounters with Drake were purely sexual, he'd occasionally kiss on her neck and other areas of her body but their lips had never been locked in whirl of passion. Not even a peck.

"You think he suspects somethin'?"

"No, he hardly notices my existence anyway." She trailed off feeling herself becoming emotional. "Look I left Mica with my Mom, I better go." She stood up quickly so as not to let him witness her in such a vulnerable state. He had of course seen her like that but only on his terms and never emotionally vulnerable, like she was now.

"I'll see you tomorrow?" He spoke to her back as she clung to his apartment door. She desperately wanted to say no but who was she kidding? She knew just as well as he did that she couldn't stay away.

"Yeah, I'll see you tomorrow."



To be continued....Maybe...