3. Delusional Drake

She sat still after re-buttoning her shirt, perched on the edge of the couch. Her mind was still trying to decipher why he wouldn't kiss her, she made it as clear as she could. Holding his face with both hands and gently nudging her nose against his yet he refused without words, only continuing to stroke in and out of her at an overwhelming pace before moving his face to her neck. There it remained until they both climaxed. Still sat on the edge of the couch she was waiting for him to start speaking like nothing had happened, like he always did. She couldn't be angry at him for that though, she did it too.

"What time's this dinner thing?" He finally spoke after pulling his shirt back over his head.

"Six. Why? You ready to go now?" Standing up she turned to look down at him. She'd never really taken the time to admire the way he looked. Of course it was obvious he was blessed in the appearance department but she hadn't properly studied his complexion, until now.

"Well, it's nearin' that time." He pulled his eyes away from his watch and starting pulling his shoes on. "We could make a move, I guess. Is Mica ready?"

"I'll go get him sorted." Tugging her shirt back into place she made her way upstairs, finally giving him space to think without her trying to read his face. He knew what she wanted but he just couldn't do it, as soon as his lips would have touched hers he just knew he wouldn't be able to cage up his feelings as well as he was now. Their relationship had already been slightly damaged by the using of one another for sex and letting his feelings out at a time like this would be destructive. Especially for Nicki. If only he could reach into her mind and see what she really wanted.

Clicking in each button on his babygro she gently picked him back up again, his grumpy whimpers becoming more distinct as she made her way back downstairs. Thankfully his stroller had dried off since he'd probably be laying asleep in it for the whole dinner. She honestly wasn't even sure what this dinner was for, she'd heard of actual wedding rehearsals but a dinner rehearsal? What was there to rehearse for at a dinner? She shook her head and positioned herself in the lounge room doorway. Drake was still sat silently. He was never this quiet after they'd pleased one another. In fact it was always the opposite, almost as if he would try and compensate by talking endlessly to try and get their minds on to other topics.

"Drake?"

"Hm?" He turned around quickly before smiling. "You ready?"

"Yeah, hopefully he'll nod off again in the car." Keeping her focus on Mica she could avoid his gaze. "You think you could deal with the stroller? I parked a few houses down. There were no spaces."

"Sure." Standing up he grabbed his wallet from the coffee table. "You go on ahead, here are your keys." Placing them in her hand he watched her head for the front door. "I just gotta make sure everythin's locked, I'll catch you up." She swiped Mica's blanket from his stroller and wrapped it around him before she entered the cold outside air. He fell asleep within minutes on the walk to her car, his tiny head resting gently under her chin. At least she wouldn't have to be worrying about trying to keep a five month old quiet in the restaurant now.

***

"No that's the one I didn't like!" She laughed with a scrunched up face remembering the distinct taste of garlic shrimp.

"Really? I thought it tasted so good." Looking back at the TV he carried on smiling before looking back at her. He'd kindly offered to stay the night at hers since Max was away and she was worried about being home alone with Mica. Not to mention he could use the company as well. The rehearsal dinner went well but Mica's grouchy wails called for an early departure, thankfully Nicki managed to calm him and the touchy tot was fast asleep in his crib.

"What?" Her random question snapped him out of this thoughts as she continued to look at him, trying to work out what was going on in his head.

"Nothin' I was just thinkin' 'bout how happy your brother looked today."

"I know! That grin did not leave his face for the whole meal!" She grinned widely. "I'm happy for him though."

"Yeah." He agreed happily before the smile slowly faded. "I want that one day."

"You mean what Lani has?"

"And you and Max. Sometimes I feel like I'm being left in the dust a lil' bit y'know? Everyone's off havin' kids and gettin' married, where am I?" The clear misery was obvious in his voice.

"You're on your way to becoming something great." She licked her lips and studied the side of his face before intertwining their hands. "You'll have that too one day. Maybe not right now, but one day."

"I'mma take your word on that." He laughed as she patted his hand, which was still wrapped around hers. As she looked down, the sight before her triggered a memory from only weeks ago.

"Remember when you came to see me after I had Mica? How mean you were?"

"I was just sayin' I thought he woulda had more hair than he did!" His wide smile made her copy him involuntarily.

"Yeah but you was laughing at my bald baby!" She forced her smirk into a pout.

"He's his Father's son. I was just pointin' it out."



"Yeah, I'm here to see Onika Samson?"

"She's in room 409 on Maternity." The woman behind the desk smiled sweetly after searching the computer for her name. "You can't miss it. The door is to the right of the elevator."

"Thanks." He nodded gratefully and headed in the direction in which he was instructed. He didn't know why but he was beginning to feel more and more nervous as he approached the elevator doors. The ride up didn't ease his growing anxiety any as he inspected the bouquet of flowers he was clutching. Why did he even bring them? What if she thought it was too much? He shook his head in response. She just had a baby, flowers should be expected. Before he got chance to spark up another question the 'ding' he heard indicated that he'd reached his designated floor. After taking a deep breath he double checked the number before entering, he'd expected to see her bed surrounded by family members cooing and smiling but it was just Nicki.

"Oh my God, you made it!" Her face lit up instantly seeing his figure walk through the door before he made his way over and hugged her lightly.

"Yeah, I got an early flight back just for you." Kissing her forehead he lay the flowers on her side table. "I gotchu these, I wasn't sure what to bring." The way he rubbed at his neck let her know he was nervous. She couldn't figure why though.

"I love them, thank you. There's a seat behind you, pull it over." Doing as he was asked he took a seat right by her bed as she admired the flowers next to her. "You just missed Max and everybody, they left to get showered up and stuff. They'll be back later."

"I thought I seen'm leavin'." He smiled up at her, she looked exhausted and pale but still amazingly beautiful. "So, where is the little man?"

"Right over here." She motioned to her other side and there he was. All snuggled up in a wheeled hospital crib beside her. He honestly hadn't even seen him when he entered but didn't waste any time making his way around to see the small baby. 

"So, this is bump?"

"Yes sir, in the flesh." She chuckled softly. "You can hold'm if you want?"

"You don't mind?"

"Of course not! Don't be silly." Having said that she still kept a close eye on how he handled her baby but what new Mother wouldn't? Relaxing as soon as Mica was securely nestled in his arms she sat back some more and tried to read his face. "What're you thinking?"

"Hm?" He looked up from the tiny infant and connected eyes with her.

"You look like you're thinking mad hard. S'on your mind?" She tilted her head and squinted a little whilst patting the side of her bed, inviting him to sit. He obliged before speaking.

"Honestly?"

"Yeah, talk to me." She rubbed his arm gently before moving her touch to Mica's soft head.

"Your baby is bald." The amusement in his tone made her mouth drop in horrification.

"How are you abouta make fun of my baby like that?" She pouted dramatically.

"I'm sorry, but look!" He gently ran his finger over the top of Mica's head and laughed as the very few tufts of hair became stuck up. This was obviously super amusing to him but she knew that wasn't what was on his mind but a very poor attempt at side-tracking her. It didn't work though.

"You're so wrong for that. I'm waitin' for the day when he's big enough to give you an ass whoopin'." Staring sternly at him she folded her lips. "I know that ain't what's botherin' you though. I'm your best friend, Aubrey. I know somethin's up. Tell me."

"You're too good at that. Way too good." Shaking his head he let the real issue come to light, he took his time saying it though. "I just...After you told me you didn't know who the Father was I couldn't-"

"He's Max's, don't worry." She gave him a tired, dimpled smile. Displaying her pure relief that Mica wasn't his but the uncomfortable silence made her frown. His heart honestly felt as though it shattered as he stared down at her baby. Ever since she'd told him she wasn't sure who was the Father he'd planted the idea in his head that Mica was definitely his. He didn't know why, he just had a gut feeling that things were supposed to be this way. Obviously life had other plans for him. The disappointment on his face was quite clear.

"Aubrey, did you want him to be-" She was cut off suddenly by none other than Max himself as he walked through the door smiling proudly.

"Hey baby, sorry I took a while." He kissed her lovingly before pulling away. "Your Mom insisted on feedin' us all before we came back."

"Don't worry about it, I knew she'd start fussin' about y'all anyway. Never mind poor old Onika sat alone in the hospital." She rolled her eyes but smiled when Drake cleared his throat. "I didn't forget you! I'm glad you came, Drake. Thank you!" She emphasised her words until his lips turned up into a smile. 

"Drake, I didn't know you were comin' in today, Nic said you were away?"

"Yeah, I was." He paused and delicately handed Mica back into his Father's arms. "I caught an earlier flight, I got some stuff to sort out here."

"Well, it was nice of you to drop by." His focus never left the baby as he took Drake's previous seat in the chair by Nicki's bedside after kissing her again.

"No problem and congratulations to the both of you."

"Thanks." His focus didn't falter but Nicki's did.

"Wait, you're not leavin' already are you?"

"Yeah, I got a bunch of stuff to sort out. Sorry, Nic." He moved swiftly over to her and kissed her cheek. "I'll come see you later on in the week, you'll be home by then right?"

"Shit, I hope so!"

"Aight, I'll see you later then." With a soft rub of her arm he winked and left without another word. She knew it was Max's return that had made him uncomfortable but she wished he'd stayed. She missed him.



"Ever since then I been wanting to ask you that question."

"What question?" He looked at her with confusion.

"I started askin' you somethin' and Max walked in." She shuffled towards him on the couch some more. "You wanted Mica to be yours, didn't you?" The softness in her voice wasn't accusative, nor was it angry. Just curious.

"I'm not even gonna lie." He rubbed at his neck, the jitters getting the best of him. "I thought he was, I hoped he was but I guess that ain't the way it was s'posed to be, right?"

"Well, yeah. Max is my husband, it'd only be right for Mica to be his child." The attitude in her words was starting to become more evident.

"Look, Nicki I didn't wanna start shit so please? Just forget I said anythin'."

"Okay, so let's just pretend just for a minute that Mica really was yours. Then what?"

"I'onno Nic! You're takin' this too seriously! All I said was I kinda hoped that the baby you were carryin' was mine! What's wrong with wantin' a family?"

"There is nothin' wrong with wanting a family, Drake. But wanting a family with a person who you ain't even romantically linked to is completely ridiculous!" She stood up quickly, grabbing their plates from the coffee table as she marched through to the kitchen and dumped them in the sink angrily.

"Aren't you forgettin' somethin'?" He frowned with pure anger as he waved his finger between them.

"Oh my God." She scoffed. "Seriously? You think we're romantically linked? You're fucking delusional!" She shook her head and leant against the counter before crossing her arms tightly over her chest. "The only link we share is a sexual one."

"Oh really? So, all the years we've spent as best friends? That means fuck all to you?!" He inched closer to her as she sighed regretfully.

"I didn't mean it like tha-"

"You know what, save it. I don't need to hear any more." He stepped back and pulled away when she tried to grab his wrist. Slamming his fist loudly on the table in a moment of anger. He knew that was a selfish move, even more so when he heard Mica's faint cries.

"Thanks a lot." Not even bothering to hide her tears she pushed past him roughly and marched up the stairs, leaving him to feel bad about the way he behaved. Entering his room quietly she leant over into his crib and picked him out. Cooing sweetly to him as her tears continued to roll down her cheeks. That argument had been in the making for a while, it was only a matter of time before it surfaced. She sniffled and kept on rocking Mica in her arms but he wouldn't settle. "C'mon baby, please? Mommy's tired." Reasoning with a five month old made her sound crazy but she honestly couldn't give two shits at that point. He wasn't co-operating anyway and cried even harder before she sat him upright in her arms and bounced him lightly. She felt like a true fool, the more he cried the more she struggled to control her emotions.

"Let me take him, you look exhausted." Jumping at the sound of his voice she turned to look at him fiercely.

"Aubrey, just go. Please?"

"No. You're tired, stressed and run-down. I shouldn't have acted like such a dick, I'm sorry." Taking small steps towards her he felt terrible seeing her cry because of him. It wasn't in his nature to act cruelly towards anyone. Especially Nicki. She sniffled yet again and kept on trying to soothe her child, only coming to a standstill when she clocked Drake's outstretched arms.

"I'll take him, I don't mind." He could see her decision ticking over in her mind before she slowly handed the small, screaming baby over to him.

"There are bottles made up in the fridge, just microwave one 'til it's warm." Not making any sort of eye contact she kissed Mica's head and left the room quickly as the tears became harder to control. He continued to calm him as Nicki was before and watched her leave the room.

Letting herself into her bedroom she shut the door swiftly, blocking out her baby's distressed mewls. Why did she feel like such a wreck after one extremely pathetic argument? It wasn't even an argument, just a harsh exchange of words. Her mind was all over the place trying to think of an answer as she started running a bath. It wouldn't cure her from feeling so down but it'd definitely take the edge off.

It was a good forty-five minutes before she surfaced from her room again. At first she was alarmed because of how silent the house was but as she neared the lounge-room she could hear Drake muttering nonsense to Mica. She smiled weakly at the sight before her. He was sat comfortably on the couch with Mica resting in his arms, he was only just beginning to feed him by the looks of it. God knows what had taken him so long.

"How does your Mommy do this?" He frowned at the bottle and shook it. "Damn, that's hot." Releasing the tight grip he had on the bottle he held it with his fingertips to ease the burn before taking it up to his mouth and testing the temperature himself. Stood in the doorway she couldn't help but smirk following it up with a giggle.

"What are you doing?" Her small voice startled him, making him look to where she was walking towards the pair of them.

"Seein' how hot it is. Why, is that not how you do it?"

"I usually drip it on my wrist." She sat down next to him, still smirking a little.

"What's so funny?" He smiled too, not knowing why she was looking so smug.

"You do know that's my breast milk, right?" She smiled again as he stared intently at the bottle.

"Well then, I guess I should compliment you. That's some pretty good stuff you got." He laughed and motioned to taste it again when she stopped him.

"Stop, you're a goddamn fool." Shaking her head and grinning slightly she glanced back down at Mica as he started to become impatient again. "You want me to take him?"

"Nah, I'm good. Unless of course you don't wa-"

"It's fine, Aubrey. You can feed him." Leaning back into the couch she tucked her feet up and watched on as he bottle-fed her child before speaking up again. "Look, I'm sorry 'bout what I said earlier. You know I didn't mean it like that."

"Don't apologise, I should be the one doin' that. I exploded for no reason, I'm sorry too." He glimpsed sideways at her and smiled. She loved when he did that, it felt like something he only ever did to her. Something that made her feel special. Having lay in the tub for so long she'd been thinking about a couple things. One which she found herself constantly wondering about.

"Do you ever wonder what life would be like if things were different? If Mica really was yours?"

"All the time."

"How do you see it?"

"It's real crazy, like, I always picture the three of us together. Just doin' normal family stuff y'know?" He became shy towards the end of his spoken dream. "But that's just what I was thinkin' when I thought he coulda been mine. Max is a lucky guy." All the while he spoke Nicki remained silent next to him, her full concentration on the words he spoke. "Why, how do you see it?"

"You mean us?"

"Yeah, if he was my son. How d'you think things would be?"

"Honestly, I have no idea." She smiled nervously and played with the hem of her pyjama shorts. "I guess I've never really thought about it." Lying through her teeth she folded her lips and quickly changed the subject. "I'mma go make us a drink, he'll be asleep soon. When he's done give me a shout and I'll put him to bed." She talked on her way to the kitchen, feeling his eyes on her every step she took.

She was right. Within twenty minutes Mica was fast asleep and she'd lay him down in his crib for the second and hopefully the last time that night. Hitting the light switch on the way out she pulled his door closed a little behind her, bumping into Drake in the hallway.

"Oh, I put some fresh sheets on the bed in the guest room and the towels are by the tub." She smiled up at him momentarily. "I think I'm gonna call it a night, I feel like a zombie."

"Aight and thanks, I'll see you in the mornin'." Leaning down he went to kiss her cheek as she turned, causing him to catch her lips briefly. "Sorry, I'm sorry I ain't mean to-" The worry on his face was adorable.

"Don't worry about it." Glancing at her feet nervously she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, trying to hide her blushing cheeks and smitten smile. "I'll uhm, I'll just see you in the mornin' then."

"Yeah. G'night, Nic." He watched her walk away, that feeling building up in his stomach was the one he feared the most.

...

*Thanks for reading and YES, Onikafaree readers who might be reading this, I will be updating either Catch Me or When Two Worlds Collide next :) Sorry if this was super boring, I feel like it dragged on forever but I didn't wanna make it last too long so more interesting stuff will be happening next chapter :) And I'm a little stuck on Sweet Dreams right now but the chapter is on its way! Thanku for all the previous comments ^_^*